יום רביעי, נובמבר 29, 2006

My proffessor - who is not known as an easy or a soft guy, but more like a harsh critic, said my poem about Yosef is excellant and I should publish it.
Its good to hear that.

יום שלישי, נובמבר 28, 2006

מוטרדת

Last Thursday I taught 18 years old boys/young men about how I view relationships as a modern-orthodox women. Its a hard one to teach.
I discussed with them this topic through using Sartre and Levinas - The diffrence between "The Other is Hell" and "The Other is a Reflection of G-d".
A lot of things I didnt say found thier way to this poem .


תן לי להיות אסקופה
בביתך שלך
לא אבקש טרקלין
לא ארצה להיות עיקר הבית
עשני אשה חרופה
הקל על דעתי
פסול את כולי מעדות
כסה את שערי
הרחק אותי בבוא עת
קרב אותי בבוא ליל
עשה כל שתרצה
קנה אותי מכור אותי
שאני רכוש ונתונה לממכר ומיקח טעות.

בחלומות שלך.

יום שני, נובמבר 27, 2006

A poem for the week : Robert Haas

MISERY AND SPLENDOR

Summoned by conscious recollection, she
would be smiling, they might be in a kitchen talking,
before or after dinner. But they are in this other room,
The window has many small panes, and they are on a couch
embracing. He holds her as tightly
as he can, she buries herself in his body.
Morning, maybe it is evening, light
is flowing through the room. Outside,
the day is slowly succeeded by night,
succeeded by day. The process wobbles wildly
and accelerates: weeks, months, years. The light in the
room
does not change, so it is plain what is happening.
They are trying to become one creature,
and something will not have it. They are tender
with each other, afraid
their brief, sharp cries will reconcile them to the moment
when they fall away again. So they rub against each other,
their mouths dry, then wet, then dry.
They feel themselves at the center of a powerful
and baffled will. They feel
they are an almost animal
washed up on the shore of a world--
or huddled up against the gate of a garden--
to which they can't admit they can never be admitted.

So whats the lesson here?

On Motzei Shabbat (Saturday evening) I went to Ikea. I always said I will never go, in London it was an exemption, but hey, once you sinned its harder to get away from the crime scene. I need a closet - I don't have enough space to hang my cloths on, and Ace or Home depot didn't have what I wanted. Ikea did. So I went there, with many other Israelites. I think Ikea is one of the last public areas in which all the sectors of Israeli society are represented. You can see men, women, old young, some are Jewish, some are not, some are secular some are observant, new immigrants, and how nicly they all shop together, looking for a better life for easy solutions, or easy solutions for better life.
So I am there, feeling bad in the first place - the Nazi background of the owner, the capitalistic approach, the lack of individuality, and the anxiety big crowded spaces bring on me.

I found what I wanted, but then I wanted more, I wrote the details in the very useful sheet of paper with the quite mini-pencil they hand out, great. I progress (or not??) to the storage area, and I discover they don't have what I want in the colour I want.
So what should I do? this nice guy approaches me, he thinks I might need help carrying something, but no. I tell him I am not sure what to do. He tells me its hid 4th time here, and he is giving up and taking something he doesn't like its colour, because its his fourth time, and he is fed up.
I wonder what should I do. But spending money on something I don't value doesnt make sense. I am giving up the shocking green book shelves, which are in storage, but not on the right shelf, and no, there is no one who can help.
I spent 20 minutes queuing at the Costumer Service department, then realized ts slow on purpose, so people will not stay to complain, and their complaints books will stay clean. I almost left completely. but then I thought about the two massive boxes in the middle of my room that I must unload. and I realized I should cool down, buy and leave.
I am not proud of going there in the first place, I am proud I didn't give in. I will go to Ace and look for book shelves. I would like to think I will not go to Ikea ever again, or at least not in the near future.
For some reason the Spelling Check is not working. So sorry. I will try to make an effort but, you know.

יום שישי, נובמבר 24, 2006

I had a vey busy week:
1. Sorting all my belongings, including dealing with 54 boxes of it. (My computer was spread out over 5 boxes). Most of the boxes had more paper then clothes/china/cuttlery. But its a good thing I didnt have to pack it myself, so I am not complaining!
2. Didnt manage to get the coputer to work. I did sucssed putting theright wires in the right place, but the mouse is not working now, and no internet yet.
3. Slept over on Tuesday night in Beer Sheva - was a wise move as it gave me more time to work on my writing and to do some limmud stuff.
5. Saw my friends three times this week, We met up on Sunday, Monday and Thursday. I am very happy I live in Jerusalem.
6. Saw all my nephews.
7. Gave my sister her birthday present I purchased for her - lovely retro china drom Whittard.
8. Went to a brit today, saw many people from Redbridge, and few thqat made Aliyah from Redbridge, was great.

I have a lot to write about, but Shabbat is coming soon... Shabbat Shalom.

יום שני, נובמבר 20, 2006

Black/White - Not only about coffee

Click on the tiltle and get the article from Haartez, reflecting on the Aroma case, but taking it further, I find this article very important.

Poam of the week by John Donne

No Man is an island

No man is an island, entire of itself
every man is a piece of the continent, a part of the main
if a clod be washed away by the sea,
Europe is the less, as well as if a promontory were,
as well as if a manor of thy friends or of thine own were
any man's death diminishes me, because I am involved in mankind
and therefore never send to know for whom the bell tolls
it tolls for thee.

Visitors

Untill this week:
The M family (they are 5 of them)
R
N
S
D
A

not too bad, it means that I get to see someone from London every 10 days. cool.
My good friend A is here, he brought me a copy of the JC.
My eyes were full of tears, reading about Paul Simon`s concert last week.
I have to say there is something about the JC that makes me feel I am still in London, it is so much part of my Shabbat expirience, ranked high as chopped liver or Seuda Shlishit in South Woodford.

יום ראשון, נובמבר 19, 2006

My container arrived on Friday!!
I reunited with my shoes, bookd and china.
It got me thinking a lot about the reasons behind my emotional relationaship I have with my posseisions. I care for them, I missed them, while they are not able to know that or care about anything. So whats the point here? Is this true love or me being silly?

יום חמישי, נובמבר 16, 2006

How raceist is your coffee?

Well, if you drink it at Aroma (which I used to, here and ther), Its very raceist. I started my own campiegn to boycot them through few internet foroums, I am happy to see Haaretz are aware to that too.
I just feel embrassed reading what the Aroma Tel Aviv owner said to a Sfaradi women. read and join me.

יום רביעי, נובמבר 15, 2006

Had lunch with L.
He lost his sister in a teror attack five years ago. We talked about breavment and loss. And I realized that altough I thought its behind me, its not. Its near.

Sderot

I am dealing with bringing Chaim Uliel to Limmud. Chaim lives in Sderot and he is very identified with Sderot a southern development town, not far or really, too close to Gaza.
The Qassam missels hit Sderot for 6 years now on a daily basis. I talk with Chaim every other day, to arrange the practicalities of his visit and concerts. Just this morning a women was killed and another man was severely hurt in a deadly attack. I called Chaim, to set a meeting, and he tells it is a bad morning. I hear the sadness in his voice. he loves Sderot, he dreams to make this town a buzzing city. Not an easy task, not easy.

יום ראשון, נובמבר 12, 2006

Yesterday as I left home on the way to Jerusalem, my mother gave me few open checks to pay the first bills for the new flat.
I looked at the checks and they carry both my parents name`s. Its very impressive that seven and a half years after my Father`s death he is helping me out with my bills.
(Of course it would`nt happen without my mother`s generosity)

Bothered

A special treat for my Hebrew readers, something I wrote lately. Might transalate one day.

מוטרדת מהעיגולים השחורים מתחת לעיני
שהם כפולת עיתון חדשות רעות על ספסל ברכבת
ואני מכוסה ומבוצרת
ואיני מגלה את אשר ליבי חפץ
גם מעצמי אני מסתירה
ומפטירה טוב תודה. וממשיכה
ולאן אמשיך עכשיו
שאיני זרה ואיני בת למקום
שמקומי אבד לי וטרם הוחזר
ועכשיו מלחמה
והתחנה רחוקה מדי
אני לא אספיק אתה אמרת
שזה נגמר
אני מביטה במראה בשעת ליל מאוחרת חצות
הלואי ויפתחו סוף סוף השמיים
ומישהו יקרא את הכותרות הראשיות

יום שבת, נובמבר 11, 2006

Poem of the week By Sharon Olds

Feared Drowned

Suddenly nobody knows where you are,
your suit black as seaweed, your bearded
head slick as a seal's.

Somebody watches the kids. I walk down the
edge of the water, clutching the towel
like a widow's shawl around me.

None of the swimmers is just right.
Too short, too heavy, clean-shaven,
they rise out of the surf, the water
rushing down their shoulders.

Rocks stick out near shore like heads.
Kelp snakes in like a shed black suit
and I cannot find you.

My stomach begins to contract as if to
vomit salt water,

when up the sand toward me comes
a man who looks very much like you,
his beard matted like beach grass, his suit
dark as a wet shell against his body.

Coming closer, he turns out
to be you - or nearly.
Once you lose someone it is never exactly
the same person who comes back.

יום חמישי, נובמבר 09, 2006

I have where to live!

Just heard I am accepted to live in a lovel flat in Jerusalem.
Very excited!
I will have a place to work, sleep, entraintain and cook. Imagine that.
All my books, cloths and music. Wow.

Why Jerusalem needs The Pride Prade??

Watch this short film, and understand why.
It is animated very tastefully.
Thanks J and C too, for forwarding this to me.

Cuddle Parties

They are the trendiest thing now in London, to find out about the next one, or just to enjoy Sam`s excellant, heart warming writing - click on the title.

יום שני, נובמבר 06, 2006

So this women calls me, she is my mother`s friend, I used to be very friendly with her daughter. She wants to introduce me to this guy. She doesnt know much about him, he is her relative. She is not sure where he lives or what he does for living. She thought to introduce him to me a while ago. (You would think she might gather some information, right? No.)
He is 39 I learn, but he looks less then that, it`s fine I am not ageist.

Oh, and she already told that I dont look good, although I do have a great personality.

Never thought my looks should mentioned as disblity catagory. Not sure I have a great personality. I surely cannot understand how can she judge one.
In my ears "Great Personality" sounds quite dragatory.It point out something else is very wrong.

And you know what? I think I look fine, somedays even great. I can lose few pounds, gain them again and still be the same gorgeouse girl.

I am sure she meant to do a good deed but I am left very hurt.

יום שבת, נובמבר 04, 2006

So what`s Limmud all about?

If you dont know its fine, just double click on the title and you can see a promo for Limmud. Its annual winter confrence will take place between 24-25/12/06, and I will be there.
If you want to apply you can go to www.limmud.org and do so.
See you there?

יום חמישי, נובמבר 02, 2006

A new word!

Had a chat with J, and got to invent a new word:
Soyography - thus is the translation of all meat into soy products. So from tomorrow you can ask where is the Soyography section in the Supermarket, or you might object Soyography as it damages the rain forests.

A new brother to Geniosity. A great new words family, Words last name of course.
If I would have only known
that ignoring me is a new form
of communication I would have
left town, looking for a pit or a cave
Where I could deal with the pain
Where your name will not be mentioned
Where there would be no one else to blame
Where discovering I am over you will be an act of creation
If I would only known that forgetting you is a new form of
celebration

יום רביעי, נובמבר 01, 2006

Muslims, ultra-Orthodox unite in opposition to planned Gay Pride parade in Jerusalem

Could you think about a more dangerous combination?
I am planning to go to the parade, to support few friends.
Must admit I am a bit worried now.
Dear readers, Maybe you can help me. I cannot decide where to live.
On one hand, I want to live in Givat Shmuel with my friend M, We have known each other since year one at school, She is just back from 2 year in New York, we have loads in common. She needs to live in the 03 area (Tel Aviv phone code). A lot of young people in the area, and if I am ever bored Tel Aviv is only 20 minutes away.
On the other hand, I study two days in Beer Sheva - which is 1:20 minutes by train from Tel Aviv, getting t the train station in the morning can take up to 40 minutes. I am probably going to work in Jerusalem, should I live there and that`s it???

You see, I wanted it to be different. Not sure what to do.
Any ideas? advices? Your own experience should you that....?
Please help me!
Got offered another Job. I think I should start making some decisions here. I am leaving too many things in the air at the moment.
Maybe deciding on a workplace will push me to find a place to live, a gym to excerise in and a nice man to marry. Maybe

Very (not) Creative Writing

I love university
I love the students
I love writing papers
I enjoy reading articles
I enjoy the best decaf on soy milk latte in Beer Sheva
I enjoy being just in time to lectures
I am a geek. I am a geek. I am a

How PC can you be???

In one of my classes (Story Telling Workshop) there is a lovely disabled young women. She dresses up very cool, her nails (toe nails) are done, she has a beautiful tattoo, as cool as I would never be.
Yesterday as the class was over I went to ask the professor a question and I stood in her way. So I said Sorry (Slicha really). Her reply made me think she said to me: Why are you apologizing? because I am in a wheelchair? Would you say sorry to any other person???

I was proud to say to her that since living in the UK I ask forgiveness from empty chairs wqhen I bump myself into them, and would say sorry to any other walking on two person I will stand in his way.
I was saddened to think about the timing of our politeness. is being polite being condesending sometimes??

I think in that case it was. Still not sure.